What’s the girls club you ask? Well, I don’t think it exists yet. I believe it’s in the works though.
Often times we hear about the ‘top’ being a boys club and how annoying it is but what have we done to build our ‘Girls Club’? What we fail to understand is MEN PROTECT MEN! That handshake turns to drinks those drinks turn to business ideas being exchanged that exchange turns to an opportunity and just like that moves are made. As women, we are still fighting for gender equity but it’s such a difficult fight based on our lack of empathy for one another and our failure to see opportunity instead, we choose to envy, bash and drag each other down. We have definitely bought into the societal construct that we somehow hate each other and hate to see one another progress. It’s amazing to me that we share much of the same struggles yet, we can’t seem to get past the differences and focus on the similarities which are way more. Even our differences make us uniquely beautiful as individuals and together? GORGEOUS!
So how do we build our ‘Girls Club’? Here are a few ideas…
1. Always be prepared to put aside emotion and apply logic. As women, we are emotional beings but we should never let that emotion hinder our growth financially, mentally or physically. Always have the ability to see past how hurt you are and understand the bigger picture (there’s ALWAYS a bigger picture)
2. Learn to forgive. MOVE ON QUICK. We tend to hold on to petty things that cause more harm to us holding on than the person we’re holding it against. Always lower expectations and remember that we are all human and no one is perfect. If Lady A offends you, understand whatever she did she did for a reason whether good, bad or ugly, it’s actually none of your business just learn to move on. Be ready to accept apologies you will never receive.
3. Fix your friendships. Obligation does not a good friendship make. Detox, rearrange, add, subtract but let it always equate to strong women in your squad. Friends who aren’t ‘yes’ girls who can check you and in the same breath ask you to go out for a drink.
4. Stop letting a woman seemingly doing better than you intimidate you. Pull her close get to know her. Let her teach you a thing or two. Take what you learn and turn it to Gold! No one is above learning.
5. Confidence!!!! You see those men that don’t seem like much but pull the best girls? Yea CONFIDENCE! Or the ones you think aren’t the brightest but close the best deals? yea CONFIDENCE! LISTEN, there will always be a prettier girl, a smarter girl, a better dressed girl, a richer girl, a girl with all the male attention….. the list is endless but there will only ever be one YOU! OWN HER and every time you step out, walk deliberately, dress like you are on a mission to kill and speak like you run the world. As the saying goes be yourself everyone else is taken. SO BE YOU CONFIDENTLY!
6. Smile! NOTHING LIKE MEETING A FINE A** WOMAN WITH A BOMB A** VIBE! Be the coolest person you can be. Turn up when you want to, turn down when you need to, reset when you should but whatever you do, smile while at it. You probably look prettier when you do that anyways.
7. Don’t be too proud to be an opportunist. CLOSED MOUTHS DON’T GET FED!
8. Respect yourself and those around you. At all times, stay in your lane. Don’t ever engage those who can’t respect you. RESPECT IS AND ALWAYS SHOULD BE THE MINIMUM.
9. Explore! This doesn’t always mean taking a fancy trip. It means stopping to smell the roses. That dingy restaurant you won’t be caught dead in might just have the best food you will ever taste. Go ahead try it!
So ladies, we may be a long way from a solid ‘Girls Club’ but we can start building by fixing these things. We are stronger than we give ourselves credit for and we are even stronger when we unite. Don’t let society continue to allow us to make enemies of each other. We have so much to offer one another if we just gathered our resources, networks, ideas etc
Goal for the week: Talk to that girl/woman who you think is ‘too much’ or ‘not enough’ learn something about her. She just might be the key to your next great opportunity.
Have a great week.